How to win your love back

4 05 2009

How can you win back the love that has gone?  First, you have to figure out what went wrong with your relationship.

What did you do?

What did you not do?

What did you over do?

What did you slightly do?

When you cheated, or hurt your partner physically or emotionally, that’s a huge reason to break up with you.  You don’t expect your partner to still hang there and pretend like nothing happened, right?  But sometimes, we do something and we’re not aware that we have been hurting our love ones, or we don’t care that they’re hurting (that’s bad).  And now, we want them back.. well, good luck to that.  We have to learn to accept our mistakes, and do our best not to do those mistakes again.

Does the things you did not do could affect your relationship with your partner?  Yes, especially when it is something that your partner had been asking you, and you did not even cared to try, or you’re that busy you have no extra time for that.  It is not about that special requests from your partner, these things could be time, a quality time together.  Spending quality times with your partner is very important.  Lack of time could make your partner think that he/she’s not important to you anymore.  And it could be one of the reasons why you broke up.. now you have an idea how to win your partner back.. at least.

Whatever that’s overly done is not right.  It’s like overdosing yourself from a drug, it could kill you, it could give you hallucinations, and it’s not healthy.  In a relationship, if you’re always giving everything, and always willing to do everything for your partner, and is not receiving the same from them, but it’s still okay with you, it’s not healthy either.  That only fits to a parent-child relationship, and if this goes on.. your partner will be so dependent on you.  There are some people who likes them to be treated like that, but not all wants to be a king or queen in the hearts of their love ones.  Yes, he/she have to be no.1 in your heat, but your partner to be the king or queen.. then your the slave?  Because it’s you who gives more love, then you become the slave, who gives whatever your highness asks.. or even not asked.

The thing is, you should also love youself.  Maybe your partner is one of the people who don’t want to be treated like a queen or a king.  Maybe your partner wants to give their best to reciprocate that love, but yours is so overwhelming that they cannot give themselves the way you do.  So maybe, that’s one of the reasons why he/she left you.  Love your partner, but don’t forget to love yourself.

Now, if there’s overdosing.. there’s also lack of love.  It could also be not giving much time to your partner, or you simply don’t know how to show your love for them.  But if you don’t love your partner that much before, and now you’re so very much into him/her, but it’s too late.. now is the right time to change.

It’s not too late to make a change, show your ex that you’ve changed.  Show him/her that you’re worth the second chance, or third maybe.. but don’t push yourself, just be friendly and be confident (which are the second and third tips).

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Is love is still in the air?

25 02 2009

Valentines day had passed.  Now everyone is busy at work and trying to earn again the money they used on that special day.  But, is it worth it?  Did everything ended up to something that you planned and dreamed of?  Did the air filled with love when you were together on that night? on that whole day of 14th?

Isn’t it nice to see couples holding hands while walking, eating on fine restaurants with music filled with love.  Then you can really say that “love is in the air”.  But on the other side of it, there are some couples who break and are fighting on that very special day for lovers.  For reasons that all relationships had encountered.  Maybe they still tried to fix it and be sweet like the other  couples, but just can’t be.  Anyway, you can’t hide hatred and all the emotions hanging on your head and pretend like you’re ok when it’s really not.  That maybe the idea of Valentines date just worsen the fight.

And now couples of days had passed, does the  sweet couples of Valentines day are still sweet? or become sweeter?  How does Valentines affect your relationship?  Does it makes you more open to each other, and made your relationship stronger?  Because some remained dull.  No matter how hard they try to save the relationship, it just can’t, maybe it’s better to cut it off, before it create more damage to both of them.  That maybe they can still be friends, maybe they’ll be better of friends than lovers.  Anyway, some ex-couples become friends, just as long as they had a good break up, no more hard feelings, and everything had a nice closure.

Love should not always be just on the 14th of February, or on 25th of December as they say.  Though those are special days, isn’t it better if we feel it all through the year,  and have no feeling of being so caught by the special holiday where lovers should be sweet all over and gifts given away to special someones?  Though those days just happen once a year, sometimes it’s all frustating that someone or rather everyone is expecting you of something which you cannot give.  Maybe it’s something that we just have to live with, because that’s the way it is, and we can’t do nothing to change it.  Just maybe next time, be more honest to each other, so there will be no risk of losing something.





When you’re gone

5 02 2009
“When You’re Gone”

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I’d need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I’m alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]
When you’re gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you’re gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you’re gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I’ve never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I’d do, I’d give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

[Chorus]

This is one of my favorite songs from Avril.  Whenever I hear this and watch it’s video, it makes me think how hard it is to lose someone who’s been with you for a long time, and the one who made you of what you are now.  Maybe Tom Cruise’ famous line “you complete me” is true.  There are certain part of you change when you’re with that person.  And sometimes, you change not because that person told you to change or forced you to change, but you change because you want to.

Then after that life changing, making you a better person.. comes the time that that person will leave you for some reasons you don’t understand and you don’t want to understand.

But is there anything you can do about it?  To get that person back in your life?

Maybe there is still chance for you to get back together and continue what you had before.  But knowing that there is no chance of getting back no matter how hard you try, will totally make you incomplete at the moment.  But life must still go on..  so you have no other way but forward, and move on (like what they always say).





Your first heartbreak

9 01 2009

I came out with the idea of making my first post when I visited this relationship forum site. There was a thread who started by a girl asking “who first broke your heart?”. The replies were not that many but are just enough for me to have an idea on how bad a first heartbreak is.

There is this one guy whom her girlfriend left him for about eight months ago, and he’s still having a hard time to move on and enjoy life. At least he found that forum to meet new friends and have had a nice chat with them, and that he really helps.

Another poster said that she was eleven when she had her first heartbreak. She really likes this guy or boy at that moment. He hid her school bag at the bus stop, then she just found out that this boy just kissed another girl after school. That’s really a heartbreak for a young girl.

First heartbreaks may leave a deep cut on one’s heart.  Sometimes it makes people not to love again, because they’re afraid that it might happen again. Another heartbreak, another wound to heal, another moving on that usually happens for a long time.

But we should not stop loving, for this makes the world go round. Love is the best gift God gave to us and continually giving. Everyone has had they’re heartbreaks, but if there’s some who haven’t experienced it, you’re so lucky. Notice this, if you had had your heart broken, it will take time before you enter another commitment because you’re choosing the better person for you well. And you don’t to end up to another relationship that will just end to another heartbreak.

Experiences make us grow stronger and intelligent on dealing with love. And one day we’ll just realized that we’re laughing at it and remembers how innocent we were before.

*If you want to know what forum am I talking about, here’s the link click!